Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Race to the Finish!

In an act of political correctness the Senate Armed Services Committee has approved a bill that would remove all white men from the military.  The bill comes after an independent study from the Military Leadership Diversity Commission was presented to Congress about how there are too many whites (namely white men) leading the United States armed forces.  The bill will make it mandatory for African Americans, Hispanic Americans, Female Americans and any other minority to sign up for military service (The bill will exclude anyone who refers to themselves as just an American, because anyone who does is just giving into the status quo and not really an oppressed minority).

The Chairman of the Military Leadership Diversity Commission, Retired General Lester L. Lyles says "We all have different backgrounds, we all come from somewhere else.  Sure I was born here, but my parents weren't...So clearly I'm from wherever they were from."

The bill will now head to the Senate floor for debate and then put up for a vote.  A statement released earlier today by the Senators backing the bill said "we need a military that reflects who we are as Americans, we aren't just white.  So to have too many of them leading our military and to have white people in our military whatsoever is just plain racist.  Since people aren't qualified to deal with this issue and handle things appropriately, the government will take care of it.  What could go wrong?"

Opponents of the bill, or as the bill supporters call them "raciphobes", released a statement shortly after asking "Are you joking?"

Russell VanAllen
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