Friday, December 31, 2010
On the Prowl
Director of the Federal Bureau of Statistics, Rob Avery says "We believe that cougars are becoming emboldened by advances in surgical procedures that help a woman conceal her age much better than say a year or so ago. That, global climate change and TV shows like Cougartown, that glamorize this sort of thing, have really added to the increase in cougar activity. I can only speculate that it will get worse."
So what can you do to protect yourself from a cougar attack? Well according to Peter Wells of the National Association Against Courtney Cox, the best thing to do is "stay in groups, name out who your specific wing-man is when out with friends (make sure their reliable) and just keep your eyes open. They are easy to spot, just look for the women who could be your mother, or Nancy Pelosi."
For more on the statistics and projections of the cougar problem visit the Federal Bureau of Statistics website at www.federalBS.com
Brilliance at it's best.